Why?

“Why is the sky blue?” the five-year-old asks from a passion to explore undiscovered knowledge. “Why can’t I drive to school?” the adolescent asks when he or she feels a passion for more freedom. “Why did they hate me?” my client asks in tears as she searches for any reasons her parents abused her. Three little letters driven by deep passion.

All these questions share a common drive toward meaning, purpose, or reason. Life feels fuller or clearer, as if it fits together coherently, when answers that provide either meaning, purpose, or reason can be found. “Why?” is the same question I found in myself when considering blogging. What is the purpose? I know that looking inside myself will be the path that leads to this answer, it seems to come from an intuitive knowing in me. I can sense the beginnings of a stir in my core that calls out for me to share, yet there is a conflict in me about acting on this call. My own sense of self-protection wants to back away from this, maybe reevaluate. I might have sensed this call incorrectly. I might have missed some information that would make the path seem clearer and feel safer to travel. Yet, I have an impression that this intuitive knowing is from God and not acting would lead to a sense of inertia in me that would deaden my heart. I have known this inertia. It is an old familiar acquaintance and it has led to nothing good in the past. I want to choose what is good, so I choose to follow the leading.

I reason in my mind as I think back to my past. “Risking with God is much better than getting stuck” Then, as if God is whispering in my ear these words come to mind, “The experiences you have had as a person, child of God, and therapist have prepared you for this new adventure.” Along with these words comes an image of a man with a machete in hand ready to cut a path through weeds taller than he is. That man is me. The word adventure rings out in my mind. It is an idea that evokes excitement and a bit of uneasiness. Like Indiana Jones pursuing another lost and priceless treasure, it is worth the risks involved to gain back that treasure. “What is that treasure?” you ask. Well, the answer to that question matches the answer to my “why” question. It is freedom and I invite you on the adventure with me.